I am so scared. And such a fuck up. But I'm going to get this thing done tonight, and then I'll be a fuck up with a finished paper. I don't know how I got into this place where doing something that shouldn't be that hard has become that hard--nah, I do know how I got here. I just gotta get thru this. And onto the next step. And become a useful person who can actually be there for someone else again. Wish me luck.

From: [identity profile] jisms.livejournal.com

whoa...


Are you ok? If it makes you feel better I am in a similar position right now.

Good luck!!!!!!!

From: [identity profile] lavendertook.livejournal.com

Re: whoa...


Yeah. It's one of those things where you're in a funk because you can't get what you got to do done, and you can't get what you got to do done because you're in a funk. And I've been in funk for a while, and I've had to get this thing done for longer. And it may be futile too, because I'm past my deadline for getting to ABD status and getting to go on to do a dissertation without getting kicked out of the program depends on it, but I'm trying to try anyway--once I finish whiiiiiining about it, that is.

I'm sorry you're in a similar position, but you're taking time to inform me of your solidarity in this icky place, does cheer me. Any advice?

Thank you. And same to you!

From: [identity profile] spookystoy.livejournal.com

LUCK!


Hurray for finished papers! But you are *not* a fuck-up. This paper is how many pages long?

From: [identity profile] lavendertook.livejournal.com

Re: Thank you!


Thank you--I'm trying not to be. It only has to be 15-20 stupid pages. It's just that I've over researched it over the past year I've been working on it--I've cut 110 pages of notes down to 26 finally--now I got to add in the critical material and keep culling and make it readable. It's an incomplete from a course I've taken a few years ago now and has tons of weight of performance anxiety on it--which is why I'm past my deadline and going nuts and all that. I don't think I have the good will of the professor I need to hand it in to. /-: I'll finish whining soon.

From: [identity profile] celtic4.livejournal.com


I'm sure you'll get the paper done, and it will be just fine. We're all rooting for you!!!

From: [identity profile] timberwolfoz.livejournal.com


*huggles* Vands, you're not a fuckup, you're just in the space where you can't see the forest for the trees.

Take a deep breath. You've got a mind like a steel trap. I'm constantly awed by your literary analysis when you beta (if you can call that literature. ;) ).

Now, repeat after me: you'll be fine. Just fine.

*sends you energy, virtual backrubs and cuddles*

From: [identity profile] lavendertook.livejournal.com


*(-: Huggles back*

Ahahaha--thank you. Aww. I do call it that, so there. But then I'm one of those anti-canonicity types outside the fandom.

I'm trying--I did get a lot done last night. And your encouragement really helped. My current job and rent and all is dependent on all this too, so I've put maximum pressure on this task.

Thank you, thank you!(-: *glomps*

From: [identity profile] abandonada.livejournal.com

You've been useful to many people despite what you think


Oh yes, get it done tonight! Do it! Do it!

My front door is open so I will hear the sound your voice on the other side of the country screaming dizzily and happily with accomplishment once you've finished the cursed thing.

From: [identity profile] lavendertook.livejournal.com

Thank you.


Your encouragement is most appreciated because I know how much you've got on your plate right now. I did get a lot done last night--going to get more done tonight too, dammit! So good vibes backatcha! Hugs!

From: [identity profile] ex-inparenth71.livejournal.com




Sweetie, I know how hard you've been working to push through this thing and get it done, and I know a lot of the frustrations and self-doubt and loathing that's been dogging you over this. And you've come so, so far hon--I know you can do this--you just have to keep going and push. You're doing this for yourself now--and you know you will feel so incredibly relieved when its over.

Keeping you in my heart and thoughts.

Jenn

From: [identity profile] lavendertook.livejournal.com


It is--I did get some good work done last night--so close now! All the encouragement really helped. (-: Thank you. Hope the semester is looking good for you. Hugs!
.

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