Peaceful Leave Taking

[lavendertook]

My mom died tonight.

I called the hospice unit right before getting ready to go to bed to ask the nurse how Mom was doing and to ask her to give my mom my love, as I've been doing these past several nights. And as the receptionist put me on hold while the nurse was with my mom, Mom took her last breath.

I saw her again last Saturday with my brother, but she did not open her eyes or speak and it is anyone's guess if she could still hear then, but I talked to her all while I was there and swabbed her lips. She had been sleeping through since Thursday night last, and on pain meds, and passed on so peacefully tonight after 14 years of battling cancer and chemo.

The phone--it was such a fraught thing with us. I'm very grateful I heard her call to share love with me at the very last.

Comments

[aliensouldream.livejournal.com]

I'm so very sorry, love. She must have been strong to come through so much. I'm sure she knew you were close and enfolding her in love. *hugs close*

[lavendertook.livejournal.com]

She was all the way a fierce fighter, and as one of her childhood friends said to me the other day, "a oner."

At the most prosaic explanation, on some level she heard the nurses say I had come on the phone to check on her, and then she could let go. I do feel honored and loved by that and blessed that we helped each other at the last, to go with all the loss and grief of our complicated relationship.